‍‍50 Hilarious Kids Jokes About School

kids jokes about school

School can sometimes be a serious place with all the learning and studying, but that doesn’t mean we can’t have a good laugh along the way! Here are 50 hilarious jokes that will have your kids giggling in and out of the classroom. These jokes are kid-friendly and guaranteed to bring a smile to their faces. So, get ready to laugh out loud with these school-themed jokes!

Best kid jokes about school

  1. Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems!
  2. Why did the teacher wear sunglasses to school? Because her students were so bright!
  3. What’s a snake’s favorite subject? HISStory.
  4. Why did the kid cross the playground? To get to the other slide.
  5. How do bees go to school? On a school BUZZ!

Easy jokes kids can tell about school

  1. What’s the smartest bug? A spelling bee.
  2. Why did the clock go to the principal’s office? Because it was always running late!
  3. Who’s the leader of the school supplies? The ruler.
  4. What’s a math teacher’s favorite season of the year? Sum-mer!
  5. Why did the bicycle fall over at school? Because it was two-tired!

Fun kid jokes about a school of fish

  1. Why are fish considered the smartest animals? Because they live in schools.
  2. Why did the fish get bad grades in school? Because it was always swimming in the wrong direction!
  3. What did the fish say to the substitute teacher? “School’s a real splash!”
  4. Why don’t fish go on vacation? Because they’re always in a school.
  5. Why was the fish late to school? Because it was fin-ishing its homework!

Funny jokes about kids going back to school

  1. Teacher: “Why are you late on the first day of school?” Student: “I saw a sign that said, ‘School Ahead: Go Slow.'”
  2. What did the pen tell the pencil on the first day of school? Lookin’ sharp!
  3. Why did the dog go to school? Because it wanted to learn new tricks!
  4. Why did the cat go to school? Because it wanted to improve its purr-formance!
  5. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Alpaca. Alpaca who? Alpaca the lunch, we’re going to school!

2nd grade kids jokes about school

  1. Why did the banana go to school? Because it wanted to split its time between learning and being a snack!
  2. How do you make seven an even number? Remove the “S.”
  3. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Broken pencil. Broken pencil who? Forget it. It’s pointless.
  4. Why are the dark ages named that? Because they have so many knights.
  5. Why did the pillow go to school? Because it wanted to take a nap in every class!

More hilarious kids jokes about school

  1. What did the buffalo dad say to his son at school drop off? Bison!
  2. Where do kids in New York learn multiplication? Times Square.
  3. Why did the kid study on a plane? He wanted a higher education.
  4. What’s a blackboard’s favorite drink? Hot CHALK-o-late.
  5. Why did the pencil go to the principal’s office? Because it needed to be sharp!
  6. Why did the broom go to school? Because it wanted to brush up on its knowledge.
  7. What’s the smartest shape? A “circle,” because it’s well-rounded in every subject!
  8. What do you call a vampire who teaches math? Count Dracula!
  9. Why was the math book always worried? Because it had too many problems to solve.
  10. What kind of tree does a math teacher climb? Geome-tree.
  11. Why did the student put their lunchbox in the oven? Because they wanted to have a hot lunch!
  12. How do you make a tissue dance? You put a little boogie in it!
  13. What did one math book say to the other math book? “I’ve got problems.”
  14. Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything!
  15. What do you call a pencil that can tell jokes? A pun-cil.
  16. What’s the difference between a teacher and a train? The teacher says, “Spit out your gum,” but the train says, “Chew chew!”
  17. What kind of tree fits in your hand? A palm tree!
  18. What did one wall say to the other wall at school? “I’ll meet you at the corner!”
  19. Why did the book go to the doctor? Because it had too many paper cuts!
  20. Why did the student bring a backpack full of rubber bands to school? Because they wanted to “stretch” their knowledge!
  21. Why did the girl bring a ladder to school? Because she wanted the highest grades!
  22. Why did the student eat their homework? Because their teacher said it was a piece of cake!
  23. How does a book stay warm? By putting on its jacket.
  24. Why did the teacher write the lesson on the window? To make it clearer for the students.
  25. Why is 2 + 2 = 5 like your left foot? It’s not right.
  26. What is a mathematical plant? The one with square roots.
Why keep laughing all the way to class?

Laughter is the best medicine, even in the classroom! Not only does it make school more enjoyable, but it also helps relieve stress and improve focus. Sharing jokes with classmates can create a positive and fun learning environment where everyone feels included. So, encourage your kids to keep laughing all the way to class and see the difference it makes in their school experience!

With these 50 hilarious jokes about school, you’ll have your kids laughing and learning at the same time. Whether it’s a math joke, a fish joke, or a joke about going back to school, there’s something for every kid’s sense of humor. So, why wait? Start sharing these jokes with your kids today and watch their faces light up with laughter!

Looking for an after-school sitter to care for your kids and maybe tell a joke or two? Join UrbanSitter to find after-school drivers, sitters, tutors, and more!

More jokes: 20 Funny Jokes for Kids, 40 Funny Valentine’s Day Jokes for Kids

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Ideas for Babysitter Activities with a School-Aged Child

Hiring a babysitter for a school-age child is often met with some anxiety on both sides unless there are activities planned. The child wonders if the babysitter will make him eat his broccoli and the babysitter hopes against hope that the child is more spunky than sulky. What resources do you have to combat this situation?

Activities to do with kids appropriate for their age:

Ask their parents to pick the game, toy, or computer games they like playing the LEAST. You won’t have the disadvantage of repeatedly being asked to engage in a certain activity and the child will be happy an adult is taking interest in their neglected game or toy.

Have the child make his birthday list (or holiday list if it’s coming up). This is usually a huge hit. Take a plain old piece of paper and have the child write or draw their ultimate wish list. You can even use those umpteen catalogs that come in the mail for inspiration and/or art supplies — cut out what they want and paste on list. Voila!

Paper crafts for kids are among the most popular. If you are not super talented in this area (join the club), get online and look up some free kids crafts on Pinterest. Use the calendar for inspiration. Valentine’s Day? Make paper hearts from coffee filters! Columbus Day? Make a native American headdress from construction paper!

Easy games for kids involving hiding things. Hide a few objects around the house or in the yard and send them hunting. Give them a bag or basket and they’ll be even happier. For older children, make a treasure map. A meticulously-detailed map with clues along the way (akin to a scavenger hunt) will engage them for a while. Perhaps the winner gets to pick the bedtime story or an extra marshmallow in his hot cocoa.

UrbanSitter is ready when you are! Find a local babysitter through people you know and schedule jobs online in minutes.

10 Creative Ideas for Entertaining a Toddler (in the dead of winter!)

With temperatures reaching inhumane lows across the country, you or your sitter are likely trapped in the house with the kids and in near desperate need for new ways to keep them entertained. Save your sanity with these fun ideas for keeping little kids happy and engaged.

10 Creative Ideas for Entertaining a Toddler (in the dead of winter!)

 

1. Fill the tub or the kitchen sink! It’s time to bathe the toys, give the Barbies a spa day or host a car wash. If you really want to surprise your kids, hold the water and instead fill the tub with dried beans or rice and let them scoop and fill to their hearts’ content.

2. Build a slide or tunnel for toy cars to race down and under, using a piece of cardboard atop stacks of books or copy this creative masking tape roadway. Take it a step further with a DIY wasabi race track.

via Le Jardin de Juliette
via Le Jardin de Juliette

3. Create a fort by draping blankets over chairs and other furniture, and pretend it’s a house, boat or a plane. The opportunities are endless. If your kids love forts, consider creating this no-sew teepee from The Handmade Home.

via The Handmade Home
via The Handmade Home

4. Throw a dance party. Crank up the music and let loose. Get in on the fun and you can knock out your daily workout.

5. Brave the outdoors and create an ice skating party for dolls or action figures, a la the one by Happy Hooligans. She also has an ingenious post on making paint for painting the snow.

via Happy Hooligans
via Happy Hooligans

6. Set up a stage for an impromptu puppet show with dolls or sock puppets. Here’s a handy tutorial for making your own sock pocket, via One of a Kind Gift Ideas.

7. Toddlers love to push and pull things. Take a toy wagon or baby stroller outside and let them “mow the lawn” or plow the snow.

8. Taste test the art supplies!? Yes, break the rules and let them eat the paint with edible finger paints. You can stress less about the mess, since they are made with condensed milk. Super simple!

via Healthy Mama Info
via Healthy Mama Info

9. Reminisce by going through family photo albums and watching videos made when they were “young.” Slightly older kids will enjoy the walk down memory lane, too. You can take it a step further by talking about their family tree.

10. DIY Matching Game. Use whatever you have on hand, from the socks in the drier to cut lengths from a few spools of ribbon to keep a toddler busy matching.

via The Fickle Pickle
via The Fickle Pickle

What’s your favorite Winter-time activity? Have you made/done any of the pieces on this list? Tell us in the comments!

Find your perfect babysitter any time of the year at www.UrbanSitter.com.

How to inject Family Fun into a Summer of Work & Camp

four out of five of the miller & friedlander kids playing cards

Summertime, which we’d so love to think of as carefree fun-time, can too often be an extended period of regret for those working moms and dads who can take few vacation days to spend with the family. But do the post-school hot months necessarily have to translate into drudgery for kids, and a guilt-fest for parents?

Not in the slightest, say Lisa Friedlander and Ilene Miller, DC-area moms who are the founders of class- and camp-booking site Activity Rocket, and between them, parents to five kids. Fun for all might just start with an attitude adjustment: one that enables you to see the summer camp you might inevitably have to enroll your kids in as something exciting and enriching rather than an unfortunately necessity.

According to Miller—mom to sons Mark, age 13, and Max, age 10—“The beauty of summer is it gives kids the opportunity to do something new, that they don’t get exposed to in school, like Claymation camp, or rock band camp, for example,” she says. “But in our area, there are also kids who spend the summer at the community pool, taking swim lessons and being pool bums.” Either way, she says, when kids are happy and tired at the end of the day, that goes a long way toward minimizing parental guilt. Which makes for happier family time all around, when you do manage to wedge some in.

This doesn’t have to be an elaborate or expensive prospect, Miller maintains. “I really value the longer days in the summertime, when the kids can stay up later,” she says. “My husband, Craig, and I try to spend a lot of unstructured family time in the evenings with them. We can barbecue outside, have family tournaments that can last the whole weekend—the kids are huge card sharks. We just get back to basics.”

The basics certainly extend to weekends, when camp and work are finished for the week. Says Miller, “We’re so lucky that in the DC area, we have hiking trails, and a lot of rivers that are accessible to us within 10 minutes, that we can kayak on with the kids.” She’s also a big proponent of finding community events, most of which are free. “In the Potomac area, we’ve got all the Smithsonian museums, book fairs, concerts in the parks, festivals—often they have no admission and the only money we’ll spend is on food once we get there.”

Friedlander and family spend weekends at a river house on the Chesapeake (if you don’t have your own, make friends with someone who does, she jokes!). “It’s very much no screens, no electronics, a lot of time spent tubing and water skiing and playing beach tennis and fishing and crabbing the old-fashioned way, with a piece of chicken tied to a rope.” With her oldest child, Jaclyn, age 14, set to head off to sleepaway camp for the entire summer, she says she’s also relishing the opportunity to spend a bit of quality time with Cole, age 11, and Camryn, age 9. As well as taking her own breather from the usual grind. “Those eight weeks of summer go by so fast, it’s important to give yourself a little bit of a break,” she says. “Whether that means not cooking every night, or not cleaning up every day, or just enjoying a walk around the neighborhood—things you wouldn’t do on a regular basis. Just slow down and enjoy the pace of summer.”

Also critical for Miller, “I need time with my husband, too, whether or not the kids are away. We’ll take a picnic and a bottle of wine somewhere, and focus on our time alone.”

But absolutely the biggest opportunity afforded even to working parents and camp kids in the summer: the fabulousness of being outside. “We get really active,” says Friedlander. “We have swimming races, and we bought a Kanjam—literally a Frisbee you throw into a slot, a team game that’s tons of fun; we all love it.”

Says Miller, “Friends helped us build a Gaga pit, which is Israeli dodge ball in a confined space. On weekends we’ll have friends over and sometimes it’s just adults in there. It’s a great way to be outside, get competitive, and work out a little aggression.” Let the summer games begin!

Got 1 Minute? 3 Art Games to Boost your Kid’s Strategic Thinking, Problem Solving and Visual Recall

By Ruthie Briggs-Greenberg

It’s Monday. You have to get your kids to school, and you’re only on your first cup of coffee. What can you do that will help them think better and not annoy you? An art activity! What, you ask, is an “art activity”? It’s something that exposes kids to art. Why should you do it? According to the National Endowment for the Arts, kids with more art experiences had higher GPAs than kids who lacked those experiences. How do you start? Pour that second cup of coffee, set the timer for 1 minute and do one of the following:

GAME 1: (The timer is set, right? Did you pour that second cup of coffee?) Ask Junior “How many things can be done with spoons?” Now wait. If Junior hasn’t had breakfast, they might say, “I don’t know.” But, if Junior just had a bowl of sugary goodness, the answer may be, “You can eat with spoons, dig with spoons… Uhhhhhh…..” Then Junior may fall silent. This is where you say, “Keep going…”  Junior may come up with one more answer, something involving “you can fling a spoon.” The minute will pass.

What’s the answer? An unknown number of things can be done with spoons. Think outside of the box, or in this case, the silverware drawer.  This idea of thinking beyond what is obvious frees your child’s mind to use their imagination.  Imagination leads to solutions. Let’s get back to the spoons.  If you weld spoons together, you could build skies, or a wall, and then you could make a house of spoons, (no, it’s not cheating, I never said, “a spoon,” or that the spoons had to remain in their original form). The question leads your child, and you, to think strategically to solve a puzzle. This method of thinking creatively frees up your mind to design, imagine and build ideas that don’t exist. That’s how art starts. You’ve spent a minute and engaged in strategic thinking.

GAME 2: Grab a pencil and a piece of paper. Ask Junior to draw a bicycle with circles, and lines. Did you set the timer for one minute? If your coffee has kicked in, you can try it too. What does this game do for Junior? It makes them think about design principles of how shapes fit together for practical use. If you want a hint, a very basic bike can be drawn using 5 circles and 11 lines. Wait a minute, how is this art, you ask? It is art because it involves organizing shapes and lines and creating a design. So you’ve just covered design, which fits under problem solving.

GAME 3: Open the cupboard and let Junior look at it for 8 seconds. This is not the time to obsess over the fact that there is high fructose corn syrup in half of the breakfast cereals. Close the cupboard. Ask Junior, “How many colors can be made from the colors on the boxes inside the cupboard?” You’ll probably get this, “I don’t know”. Who thinks about cereal boxes and art? Ask Junior to open the cupboard and see if there is red, yellow and blue inside, if so, you have the three primary colors. All colors can be made from the three primary colors. Play a color addition game (go on, the first part wasn’t even 20 seconds). What is red plus yellow? Orange. Was there a yellow box on your shelf? A blue one? Sure there was, everyone has that blue box of pasta on the second shelf, so now you have yellow plus blue. You get the picture. Now you’ve covered visual recall.

Wow, look at you, covering strategic thinking, problem solving and visual recall all before your 3rd cup of coffee! Junior used art, or thinking about art, to fire up those synapses before class. Thinking about art will carry over into other areas of study, such as math, language, and science. Ultimately art allows individuals to create something from nothing by strategically analyzing a problem and solving them. If you have five minutes, tour the world’s greatest museums online. This may lead to conversations about the historical context that art was created in, or the purpose of art. If you ask Junior what they think about a painting they are looking at they may say, “I don’t know”. That’s ok, school doesn’t train our kids to think of possibilities, it teaches kids to have answers. Get Junior thinking and they will come up solutions to all kinds of life situations. 1 minute art games lead Junior to strategic thinking, problem solving and visual recall, and you did it all without a 4th cup of coffee.

Photograph by D Sharon Pruitt via Flickr/Creative Commons

Sharpen School Skills with Fun, Educational Games & Activities

meg_son_drawingExperts estimate that kids spend the first 2.3 months of the school year learning what they’ve forgotten over the summer. Yikes!

Help your kids brush up on their skills, before the first school bell rings, with these effective learning tools that can easily pass as fun games and entertainment.

Smart Games to Prepare for the School Year

Alphabet Tracing Chart 

Free, printable alphabet handwriting worksheet in a fun Back-to-School theme.  Traceable worksheets help preschoolers through First Graders learn to write letters A to Z in upper and lower case.  The worksheet features a start dot on each letter to help kids remember where to start writing the letter. Tip: Laminate and use fine tip erasable markers for repeated use.

Traceable Alphabet
Photo: First-School

LEGO Math Practice

LEGO activities are a visual way for kids to do math. And for the LEGO enthusiast, this might just be the sure-fire way to encourage math practice. The printable worksheet is great for kids to work on addition and subtraction. For younger kids, simply use LEGOS to work on colors, sorting and counting.

LEGOS
Photo: The Kent Chronicles

Book Picks for Kids 2-12

Research has shown that the single most important thing that a parent can do to help their child acquire language, prepare for school, and instill a love of learning is to read to them (Russ et al., 2007).  If you need a few new books to add to your repertoire, check out Cool Mom Picks Roundup. They have compiled an awesome list of their editors’ own children’s favorite books, including picks for ages 2-12.

kids-favorite-books-ages-2-12-cool-mom-picks_zps2a1d71ac
Photo: Cool Mom Picks

Melissa & Doug Letter Puzzle

Little kids can work on motor skills, letters and numbers with a simple puzzle that includes all 26 letters of the alphabet in uppercase and lowercase, along with 26 gorgeously detailed illustrations of various animals. $11.99 at Target.

Letter Puzzle
Photo: Melissa and Doug

 

Top 10 Educational Apps for Preschoolers

If you’re in the camp that believes in embracing the power of technology as a teaching tool, try out these educational apps for preschoolers. The list includes practice games for handwriting, letters and numbers for iPad and iPhone devices. Costs vary.

Apps
Photo: Handwriting Without Tears

Magazine Letter Printables for Literacy Station

You can avoid the time and mess of cutting letters out of magazines for your child to use for literacy exercises – such as finding the alphabet or creating words or phrases – with this super cool Magazine Letter Printable, just $7 from Etsy.

Magazine Letters
Photo: Olive Loaf Design

5 Games for Speaking, Listening and Thinking

Verbal games are great for developing speaking and listening skills, and thinking and reasoning abilities. They are ideal to play on a long car trip, or while your child’s hanging out in the kitchen while you make dinner. Try them with kids age 3 and up.

Childhood-101-Speaking-Listening-Thinking-Learning-Games-for-Kids
Photo: Childhood 101

All of these games and activities are great to leave with the babysitter. Find trusted babysitters and nannies at UrbanSitter.com.