3 Parenting Myths about Children & Sleep, Busted!

By Dawn Van Osdellsleep+toddler

There’s a lot of contradictory and downright erroneous parenting info floating around out there. We’re not afraid to tackle it head-on! 

You may be past the days of coaxing your newborn to sleep through the night, or convincing your toddler to get in bed while his older siblings are still awake. But sleep challenges don’t always disappear when your little one graduates to the big kid bed! This month, we
turned to psychologist and family sleep coach Sasha Carr, Ph.D. to help us bust three myths about sleep challenges related to growing children.

Myth #1: We have so much to do after school—activities, homework, dinner, spending time together as a family. It’s okay to push bedtime back to a later hour, since my child will be extra tired and is sure to sleep better.

Truth: It may seem reasonable to keep kids up later so we can squeeze more into our busy evenings, but the latest sleep research tells us that this isn’t a wise or productive solution. Although most young children naturally wake between 6:00 and 7:00 am, they are more likely to wake even earlier if they’ve gone to bed later, since overtired kids don’t sleep as well. They often have a hard time staying asleep through the night, or wake super early and aren’t able to go back to sleep, explains Carr. It’s important to stick to a reasonable bedtime so kids can load up on what Carr calls the “power hours” of sleep, that early, non-REM sleep time when we all sleep more soundly; this way, kids will easily be able to fall back to sleep after those normal, brief awakenings in the second half of the night.

You can make getting a good night’s sleep a priority in your house by holding tight to a reasonable bedtime. To get there, carefully consider which after-school activities are best for your child and your family and, when possible, scale back or move some of them to the weekends.

sleeping+child

Myth #2: My child isn’t a baby anymore so he doesn’t need a bedtime ritual. Plus, now that he stays up later, I’m too tired to keep the routine going.

Truth: Bedtime routines can become like death marches for parents, especially if they’re too long and complex, or if they drag on too late into the evening. “While it’s tempting to cut your exhausted self some slack and skip the ritual, keep at it,” says Carr. Routines are reassuring even to older children, giving them consistency and calm and as a result, helping them fall asleep. If you already have a routine, work on shortening or simplifying it, so it’s easier for you to stick with it.

Thirty minutes is the ideal amount of time to be fully engaged with your child at the end of their day. So if bedtime stretches too far into the night, consider starting your bedtime routine a half hour earlier. If you always read three books, cut back to two. If you have more than one child to put to bed, save your sanity by adjusting your routine so that it includes everyone and accommodates age differences; alternate reading a chapter and picture books aloud, or have an older child read to his younger sibling, for example.

carseat+napMyth #3: My child finally sleeps through the night and it’s going to stay that way forever!

Truth: Bravo to you for reaching this amazing sleep milestone! But be aware that sleep habits can change as kids grow and also change. It’s not unusual for preschoolers to have difficulty falling asleep at night, especially during a period of change, such as starting school; and some children experience night terrors—similar to nightmares although much more disruptive to the rest of the family than to the child having them—typically between the ages of 3 and 12.

Also, interestingly, Carr points out that many children progress to an 8:00 pm bedtime as they get older, but our bodies’ circadian rhythms give us a
boost of a hormone called cortisol right around this time, which makes us more alert and therefore, less able to fall asleep. Outsmart it when the time comes, either by putting kids in bed before 8:00 pm (if they’ll stand for it), or establishing an 8:00 pm quiet time in which they can read or lie around before lights out, with the aim of having them drift off to sleep by 8:30 pm.

Photographs courtesy of UrbanSitter

 

How to be an Awesome Room Parent

image via flickr
image via flickr

You’ve signed on as room parent for your child’s class. Huge props to you! Your willingness to take on added responsibility is admirable and your mad organizational skills appreciated. As a classroom parent, you’re charged with serving as the main source of communication between your child’s teacher and all of the parents in the class.

Your duties likely include keeping everyone informed and up to date on class news and events, coordinating class parties, collecting money for teacher gifts, and recruiting volunteers to help meet the teacher’s needs. It’s a big responsibility, but you can do a stellar job and keep it manageable by following these helpful tips.

Don’t go it alone. Rather than handle it all, recruit another parent as a co-room parent and split the duties. One of you can handle email communication and calendar updates, and the other coordinate parties, field trips and events. Having a partner will keep you from becoming overwhelmed with ongoing tasks.

Have a sit down meeting with the teacher to synch expectations. This is your chance to understand the needs and responsibilities of the job, get a list of events for the calendar, obtain a class contact sheet and agree on how you and the teacher will communicate. Ask about any allergies or special needs in the class that you need to be aware of. Also get a sense of her style and ask about her favorites and preferences so you’ll be ready to choose the class gift.

Go digital. Keep an updated class calendar, whether it be on the classroom blog, school website or a site such as Shutterfly. Also make use of volunteering services like Volunteer Spot for communication. The sites will keep everything up to date and allow you to recruit volunteers, request things like extra supplies or snacks, and collect money for field trips and group gifts without sending countless emails. Using these services also helps to eliminate the dreaded Reply-All communication strings.

Help families get to know each other. One of the nicest things you can do for your child’s class is to help their families build relationships with each other. Sometime at the beginning of the year, long before holiday chaos consumes us all, send a welcome letter and schedule an informal meet and greet. There’s no party planning involved. Simply invite whoever is interested and available to meet somewhere local for coffee after school drop-off or for drinks one evening. It’s a wonderful opportunity to get to know your child’s friends’ parents, put faces to names, and compare notes on how the year is shaping up. You may end up finding a new carpool buddy, and you’ll certainly improve your chances of recruiting volunteers later in the year.

Make it a family affair. Involve the kids and your spouse by sharing duties. Your child will get an up close view of what you are doing for his classroom, and come to appreciate the work that goes into having a well organized and fun filled school year. It’ll also help take a lot of work off your to-do list.

With a little planning and upfront work, you can take the stress out of your duty as room parent and turn the experience into a rewarding opportunity for you to contribute to your child’s education and build lasting relationships with other families in the school. Congrats to you for stepping up to the job!

4 Things to Do Before Summer Break

We are weeks, if not days, away from the end of the school year and the start of summer break. Before you let go and slide into the spontaneity and freedom of summer, take a few minutes to tackle these four things. They won’t take much of your time, and by thinking ahead, you’ll guarantee your family a happier, less stressful, and more productive summer together.

colette-swim

 

1. Determine a summer routine
Part of the charm of a summer break from school is getting a pass from the routine of the school year and having more time to do what we please. There’s no school bell, no homework, there’s more time to spend outdoors and more relaxed bedtimes. No one wants to rob their children of that freedom and their chance to simply be a kid enjoying a carefree summer, but it’s also important that we keep a sense of routine going in their lives. Experts insist that kids need routines to know where they stand and what’s expected of them. Routines establish a model for healthy living, help to set good habits and they give comfort and security.

Without school to add structure to their day, you need to spell out to your kids how things are going to work. Map out an average summer day in your family, including an acceptable time to start the day, how much screen time is allowed, rest or nap time, camps or special activities, chores that are expected, meal and snack times and bedtime. Be sure to allot for plenty of unstructured time, outside play and time together as a family, too. The objective isn’t to set a schedule with military precision, but to create an outline that will help guide the less structured days of summer, keeping them enjoyable and stress-free.

2. Register for camps
If you haven’t already registered your kids for camps or drop-off activities, jump on it and find a few options to keep kids occupied and entertained during the long, dog days ahead. There are plenty of affordable options, including mini, half-day camps and programs offered by local libraries, churches and schools to entertain the kids and provide you with a few hours of freedom to work, rest or play. Find the right camps, and your kids will see the time as a fun break and a special summer memory.

3. Book a summer sitter
No matter how much fun you have planned and how much you’ll cherish the extra time with your kids, you’ll need a break. Scheduling a regular sitter gives you the peace of mind of knowing time to yourself is right around the corner. You’ll be able to better enjoy family time when you aren’t struggling to squeeze your own needs and responsibilities into the mix. UrbanSitter makes it easy to find a sitter who’s available when you need help – say, three mornings or two afternoons a week, to plan ahead for date nights or special occasions, and to find childcare for the last-minute invite from a friend who happens to be in town.

4. Set goals
While setting your summer schedule, give some thought to your objectives for the months ahead. A little advance planning and a strategy will help ensure that you don’t wish away the time and find yourself at the end of the break wishing you had accomplished more. Set personal and family goals, such as making more time for your own hobbies and spending more time having fun as a family. Depending on the ages of your children, good summer goals can be traveling to a new place together, teaching your son how to ride a bike or confidently jump into the pool without swimmies, entertaining more spontaneously, sleeping under the stars with your kids, or getting away for a weekend alone with your spouse. School-age kids will enjoy and grow from setting their own goals. You might suggest goals, such as reading 10 books or logging a set number of hours of reading, attending sleep-away camp for the first time or learning or improving on a new skill.

This helpful to-do list shouldn’t take any joy from your summer, but rather help improve your chances of having the idyllic break you and your family deserve.

What’s on your summer to-do list? Let us know in the comments!

Teacher Gifts to Show Your Thanks

meg_son_flowerWith the end of the school year in sight, it’s time to think about teacher gifts for your children’s tireless educators. Teachers have one of the toughest jobs on the planet. Each September, families hand over their children, and entrust teachers to nurture, enrich and fill their minds with knowledge and responsibility to help prepare for the world.

How do you show your appreciation and gratitude? Whether you’d like to give a homemade gift or something practical, or you’re charged with buying or creating a gift from the whole class, we have thoughtful gift ideas that will go easy on your time and budget.

Group Teacher Gifts from the Class

If you’re the lucky parent charged with collecting contributions and choosing a class gift for the teacher, choose a collectively built gift that’s simple and sure to be loved. Choose a theme and assemble a gift basket or package that everyone in the class can contribute to fill.

To avoid the flurry of email communication that can flood your inbox when coordinating for a large group, rely on services such as Sign Up Genius, which will handle a lot of the coordination and help avoid duplicate purchases. To hold all the loot, use a cute bag or tote, which you or another family in the class can contribute.

Here are cute ideas for the class-contributed contents for a summer-themed package:

via Tidbits and Twine
via Tidbits and Twine
  • Beach towel
  • Gift certificate for Mani/pedi
  • Magazine
  • Paperback book
  • Journal
  • Small photo album
  • Insulated tumbler and drink mix
  • Sunscreen
  • Lip balm
  • Summery nail polish
  • Gift card to department store, a sunglasses or sport store
  • Monogrammed Frisbee
  • Cute drinking straws or drink stirs
  • Cocktail napkins
  • Reusable ice cubes in a fun summer shape
  • Outdoor tumblers and a pitcher
  • Deck of cards or a game

Quick and Easy “Homemade” Teacher Gifts

Looking to go beyond a store bought gift, but have less time than inspiration? Rather than tackle a big DIY project, you can add an extra, homemade touch to a store-bought (or homegrown) gift of flowers or a potted plant. Personalizing an always appreciated gift of green shows you’ve gone the extra mile to show you care. Here are three sweet and simple ways to embellish a potted plant or bouquet of flowers.

1. Chalkboard Pot from The Idea Room on Skip to My Lou you can customize with a personal note to your child’s teacher.

via The Idea Room
via The Idea Room

2. Handmade Container from Love of Family and Home.

via Love of Family and Home
via Love of Family and Home

3. DIY Succulent Terrarium from That’s Quirky.

via That's Quirky
via That’s Quirky

Picking Up a Practical Teacher Gift and Packaging It Just Right

Save yourself the agonizing and shopping for the perfect gift. Nothing is more useful to a hardworking teacher on a limited salary than a gift card to a favorite store, café or restaurant. A gift card allows him or her to splurge or spend as they like. These fun, free gift card holders to print will personalize a gift that may seem a bit impersonal. There’s one for coffee, a book store, the movies and good ole Target.

gift holder hip2save
via hip2save

No matter how you choose to thank your child’s teacher, remember that a personal note of thanks from you and your child is often the most important gift of all. Find the perfect babysitter for summer break at UrbanSitter.

Tips to Help Ease Your Child’s Separation Anxiety

julia - sunhat girl

Guest Post by Vicky Keston of Gooselings

If your life with young children is anything like mine, it’s rare that you’re able to walk to the bathroom without a child attached to your legs or shower without a child or two peering through the glass. Needless to say, you need a break, but how do you get help from a babysitter when your child won’t leave your side?

According to childcare experts, children have an innate need to bond with their caregiver before they can trust them. Separation anxiety is common, but even young children can overcome their anxiety and bond with their sitter, giving you some much needed time to yourself. These useful tips will help you to understand the anxiety your child is feeling and take the necessary steps to make time away from you enjoyable and stress-free.

Tips to Ease Separation Anxiety

Find the right sitter for your child.
Interview potential sitters carefully to find one that both you and your child like and trust. Children can detect our nervousness, so your confidence in a childcare provider is important. Make the right choice by reviewing sitter background checks or paying to run one if it isn’t provided. Also check references from other parents and employers. When interviewing the caregiver, ask how she would handle your child’s separation anxiety and discuss strategies that might work best for your child. For additional questions to ask a sitter in an interview, check out this helpful article on interviewing potential childcare providers.

Do a trial run.
For the first time or two, ask the babysitter to watch your child while you’re in the home. Give them time to get comfortable together, then slowly ease your way out. Think of the preschool analogy in which teachers often tell parents to sit along the edge of the room while their child interacts with the teacher, feeling safe that their parent is in the room.

Read a book about Mommy always returning.
You can show your child that you understand her worries and assure her that your time apart is temporary by sharing books with characters they can relate to, such as “The Kissing Hand,” by Audrey Penn or “Owl Babies” by Martin Waddell. For children who are anxious about the transition to daycare or preschool, “My First at Nursery School,” by Becky Edwards is a comforting read.

Call it a playdate.
Tell your child that a new sitter is coming for a special playdate. Talk about how much fun they will have together, and discuss what types of things they can do together. Be enthusiastic. If you are nervous, your child will be, too.

Make it a quick goodbye.
When the caregiver arrives, say goodbye and remind your child that Mommy always comes back.

Create a family book.
Include photos of you, your child and the other important people in their life. It can be as simple as photos taped onto paper that you staple together, or as fancy as a photo book.  Leave this with the caregiver, so that your child can look at the photos when feeling lonely. If your child begins to miss you, ask the caregiver to help her write a letter or make a card for you.

Following these tips will help your child to build a bond and ultimately trust in a sitter, making it easier for her to be away from you. Remember that it’s healthy for your child to develop these bonds with others and just as important for you get a break.

For additional recommendations on leaving your child with a caregiver, see advice from Dr. Sears. For children starting preschool, see additional ideas at http://gooseling.com/2013/09/04/transitioning-to-preschool/.

 Find friend-recommended babysitters at UrbanSitter.com.

5 Special Back-to-School Traditions to Start this Year

IMG_0374Even if you are sad to see the summer go, there’s no denying the excitement a new school year brings. You can get your kids motivated for a fresh start and build lasting memories by starting back-to-school traditions you can repeat each year. These fun, memorable traditions will have everyone raring to go!

To help you create traditions that are just right for your family, we’ve pinned loads of great back-to-school ideas, tips and products to our Back-to-School Pinterest Board and included links below. We hope they are helpful!

Start a New Back-to-School Tradition:

1. Super Star Shopping Date

Remember the thrill of picking out new school clothes when you were a kid? Maybe you got a new backpack, lunchbox or some fresh kicks.  No matter how much or how little was on the shopping list or what’s on your list for your own kids, everyone loves  starting the year with something new.

  • Take advantage of pre-fall sales and hit the stores with your child. Make him or her the center of attention by arranging to send siblings on a playdate or hiring a sitter to take over while the two of you are on a date.
  • Stock up on school supplies, gear and clothes for the new year.
  • Keep budgets in check by first doing a closet and drawer assessment with your child, deciding together what’s needed. Organized Home posts helpful strategies for Back-to-School Shopping.
  • Make shopping a fun event by including a stop for lunch and using the time with your child to talk about highlights of the summer, and plans and goals for the new year.

2. Meet a New Teacher and Host a New Friend

For a child, walking into a new classroom can be a scary thing. Seeing a familiar face in the room always makes it a bit a easier. Take advantage of opportunities to meet the new teacher and visit the classroom to build familiarity and calm first-day anxieties. It’s also helpful, if you have a class roster or know of a child who will be in the same class, to schedule a playdate with a classmate who happens to be an old friend you haven’t seen in awhile or make an introduction to a new friend.

Turn it into a fun tradition by making it an annual project to find a new or long-lost friend to meet up with after orientation day. You can make it extra special by meeting at a local park and bringing a treat to share or at a local ice cream shop for Back-to-School cones.

3. Tweak your Routine and Refresh your Homework Station or Quiet Time Spot

morning routine
Photo: IHeart Organizing

Being organized feels fantastic and  gives everyone in the family a sense of control and preparedness. Have a tradition of holding a family meeting to discuss with older kids what could be improved from last year and to share with everyone what the routine will be once school starts.

This is the time to roll out new calendars, introduce new sitters and make sure kids know what to expect. There are lots of free printables that will help you organize expectations, including chore charts, weekly planners, lunchbox planners you can create with your child, and even simple This is Our Morning Routine and This is Our After-School Routine printable charts that will help kids stay focused and limit the number of times you’ll be barking orders, such as “Put your shoes on!”

If you have school-age kids, now is the time to refresh supplies for homework and organize them in a location that’s easy for kids to access. For younger kids, you can perk up the quiet time area, maybe adding a few new books to the collection or making a space more inviting by seeing that it has a comfy spot to rest and plenty of light for reading.

4. Share a Story and a Craft

Get kids excited about school and address concerns and worries by sharing a book about starting school. Picture books can help to reassure kids about starting school or going to a new school, and they also serve as catalysts for better communication at home. Check this handy list of top children’s books about starting school, including books that talk about first day jitters, how to make new friends and simply what to expect so the day is not so scary.

If you have a crafty crew, get them excited for the big day by spending time together on a Back-to-School project.  Red Ted Art has a popular round-up of back to school craft ideas that are sure to get school spirit soaring.

5. Make the First Day Extra Special

first day of school sign
Photo: Just Imagine

Create a tradition of great fanfare on the first day of school! This doesn’t mean you have to spend hours planning menus and creating DIY decorations. It just means putting a little extra TLC into the day to turn it exciting and memorable. Here are some simple ideas you can do each year:

  • Get up earlier to set a pretty breakfast table with fresh flowers and a favorite breakfast that you don’t typically serve on a week-day morning, such as these French Toast Roll-ups that are so easy, they could easily become a week-day staple.
  • Have each child pose for a First Day photo you can save in special photo album. Take it up a notch by having your child hold a small sign or chalkboard  marked with the date and a personal note, such as his favorite activity or what he wants to be when he grows up.
  • Pack a special lunchbox treat with a note reminding the recipient that you are thinking of him all day long.
  • Pick up a special after-school snack, such as these Chocolate Coconut Graham Crackers that take good’ole graham crackers to a new level,  or a all the fixings for First Day sundaes. Take time out of your day to either sit with your child or call them to hear the highlights of the big day.

One more tradition to start (just for mom and dad): The occasional night out! Find a trusted babysitter at UrbanSitter.com.